carmen
What I Remember Them Saying
This piece of art that I created, triggered/inspired by the #metoo movement, may make you uncomfortable.
I stayed quiet for more than 20 years about my experiences because I didn’t want to make anyone uncomfortable, because I felt embarrassed and ashamed, because I didn’t want to tarnish my reputation or my family’s - as if what others had done to me was somehow my fault and could reflect poorly on me or those I love.
That is how messed up our culture is. We would rather just not talk about it and pretend the bad things didn’t happen. Or we do talk about it and we blame the victim - because if you can believe the victim “had it coming,” then you can rest easy that it will never happen to you, that you will always be in control of what happens to you.
So I tried to “just get over it” without saying a word. But guess what? Covered wounds never heal. So this was me finally ripping off the Band-Aid. I decided I would no longer accept the responsibility for others’ actions. I decided I had nothing to hide. I decided to care about myself more than I cared about keeping everyone comfortable.